Saturday, September 13, 2008

This is WonkyEye.

Hey! I feel like I should introduce myself to properly launch WonkyEye. That is, if blogs are 'launched.' I don't really know.

Anyway, this is me (and my amazing boyfriend Dennis).

Christine and Dennis in love.

We live in Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada. Where it's actually really warm in the summer and we hardly get any snow in the winter anymore, much to my chagrin. Luckily skating is just as much an indoor sport, although it does lose some of its charm when all you do is go around in circles.

I also have a dog, her name is Belle. She's 14 years old and still very spunky. She's an important member of our team to be sure.


We've lived together (Dennis and I... Belle and I have been roomies for the aforementioned 14 years) since May in an apartment that still doesn't have any pictures on the walls. Shameful, I know. But, it does have some other fun stuff, such as:

An awesome rug I ordered from Urban Outfitters.

A fish in the window!

Really big windows and a teddy bear on a chair.

A shower curtain from Home Depot that I maybe love a little too much.

In our free time (which is rare these days, with Dennis being a student and working part-time and me with my full-time waitressing gig), we like to watch movies, play video games, catch shows (nous adorons la musique! Ha! Another Canadian blessing, bilingualism) and play...


My existential crisis began at age 15 when my high school guidance counsellor asked me, "Christine, what do you want to do with your life?" Obviously I was meant for something great. Surely I was to be a key player in saving the world. My future career would be nothing short of amazing. Obviously.

Well I laboured under this misapprehension for 13 years. Yes, count them. A baker's dozen of years where I asked myself day in, day out, "What am I going to do with my life?"
This was not fun. It took me six years to graduate with a Bachelor of Science in Agriculture. I changed universities three times and my major eight, including but not limited to: plant science, public relations, clinical nutrition, biochemistry and classics. Yep, that would be the study of ancient history necessitating fluency in Latin or Greek.

Upon graduation, I lucked into a "real" government job. My experience there is a long and convoluted one. Suffice it to say, I was bored, uninspired and generally miserable. After three years and a lot of tears, I finally resigned. This was 2005.

I immediately did some travelling, of the North American variety.

Can't get any further without yer flippers!

The Badlands of South Dakota.

And I even hopped over the pond for a little jaunt to Scotland.

The Isle of Skye, Scotland. And no, I'm not photo shopped in here!

But mainly, I racked my brain, thinking of career options. And to be fair, annoying anyone who would listen (thanks Mom and Dad) with discussions of either my woe some plight or the current 24-hour plan for which I'm famous. At one point, in all seriousness, I wanted to open a cafe that sold only chocolate-based goods. I believe it closely followed a viewing of Chocolat.

Since 2005, I have started and quit (quitting being a forte of mine) a number of programs and courses: reflexology, holistic nutrition, English and history courses via correspondence, public relations and flash-based web design. I've also taken a number of photography and sewing courses through the local art college. Though I don't think these have in any way helped in the development of my skills. To pay the bills, I have been serving at a restaurant downtown. Which I love. And hate.

So recently Mom & Dad have re-discovered their relationship with God. Not with a vehement born-again kind of vigour, but in a quiet, peaceful renewal. Their new found peace peaked my interest because as I close in on 30, the one thing I long for most in my life is peace. I started doing some exploring on my own, and while doing some reading I stumbled on this little gem of advice from our old friend Saint Matthew.

"Therefore do not be anxious about your life... do not be anxious for tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Let the day's own trouble be sufficient for the day."

Suddenly I realized that I had been living the last 13 years in the future. I had been building my life around an un-met husband, unborn children and the eventual change I was so importantly going to create in the world.

Well, that's kind of lame, don't you think?

Something clicked. You know how when you're single and wishing with all your heart for a boyfriend you never meet a soul? You think you're doing everything in your power to put yourself out there but never to any success? And then when you decide to forget it and become happy with your own self... presto! The love of your life shows up on your doorstep.

That's the approach I've decided to take with finding a career. Well, it's a two-pronged approach really. Step one is to get over myself. Maybe... just maybe, I'm not going to change the world (gasp). Perhaps my most important role on this planet is in the form of best friend, loving daughter, sister or even, dare I say it, friendly waitress.

Step two is to forget about it! I'm going to focus on doing things that make me happy. Things that I've had an interest in for a long, long time. (See exhibit A).

Exhibit A: Christine, age 10, finally gets her own warp on her Mother's loom. Happiness pursues.

But for some reason, didn't think I could do. I wasn't creative enough. I'm not an artist. I don't wear second-hand clothing and my practicality and logic overrule everything I do. Also, I don't believe myself to be an original thinker... yet. Most of my creative endeavours have been stolen from someone else's genius. But I've decided to let that go... have you ever heard of a man named Bob Dylan?

I'm hoping that by forgetting about finding the perfect career, I will find one. A little reverse physchology on the universe so to speak. In the meantime, my plan is to lighten up and have some fun with my camera, fabric and thread... and document it for a laugh. Welcome to WonkyEye!

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